“Self-compassion is a self-attitude that involves treating oneself with warmth and understanding in difficult times while recognising that making mistakes is part of being human.”
— Kristin Neff

Create a Self-Compassion Mantra for yourself or with your teen. I highly recommend doing this activity as a family so that when someone in your tribe is struggling and being hard on themselves you can remind each other of the 3 doors of Self-Compassion! Even if your teen isn’t into it, it’s a great activity for parents and caregivers because let’s face it, parenting is HARD and we can be unnecessarily hard on ourselves.

The mantra has 3 components. The first step is to notice when you are suffering and create awareness around the negative feelings. If we don’t notice our suffering, we tend to jump straight into fix-it mode or blame. Step 1 of Self-Compassion is MINDFULNESS. Simply acknowledge that this is a tough moment and it doesn’t feel that great. Step 2 is COMMON HUMANITY. The purpose of this is to remind ourselves that suffering is a part of life and you are not alone in what you are going through. Normalising the experience helps us to not feel so isolated and take comfort in the knowledge that others have had similar experiences. Step 3 is to ACTIVELY practice SELF-KINDNESS towards yourself. Show yourself the warmth and understanding that you would a dear friend.

Step 1: This is a moment of suffering

step 2: Suffering is a part of life

Step 3: May I give myself the compassion I need

Some other options that might suit your teen and your family

  • MINDFULNESS:

    I’m having a really hard time right now

    It’s painful for me to feel this now

    Right now I’m feeling …..

  • COMMON HUMANITY:

    Every one feels this way sometimes

    This is part of being human

    This is a normal human feeling

  • KINDNESS:

    I am worthy of receiving self-compassion

    I will try to be as compassionate as possible

    May I be gentle and understanding with myself

Now, create a 3 part mantra you can say to yourself or each other in tough moments. Make it as unique and as fun as you want! Every family is different :)

  1. ___________________________________________________________

  2. ___________________________________________________________

  3. ___________________________________________________________

Thank you for joining in and I hope this mantra brings you some peace in the moments you or your young person are having a hard time. I would LOVE to hear about your mantra and how you went getting through the activity. Drop me a line here anytime! Tracey